Hillary

Hillary would make a good president. Chelsea would make a better president. This country needs to break free from the Clinton and Bush families. I will concede the fact that she would have a great advisor in her presidency. You don't think she'd listen to him though, do you? Hillary is owned by big business. She will do and say whatever it takes to win the nomination. She says she's against the war, and then votes to extend the war. With Hillary, it's business as usual. If Hillary wins the nomination I will vote for her. Let's all hope it doesn't come to that. I won't caucus for her and I won't vote for her in the primaries. She can't win the big one. This country isn't ready for a woman president.

Barak Obama

Barak would make a good president. Is he presidential though? I'm not so sure he is. He would be great as a vice-president. I'm not so sure he would accept that. It would be like the lone guy riding in the back seat. I feel that Barak as vice-president would help to condition people to the fact that black people aren't bad. Nothing would energize the Republicans more than a black running for president. Wrong as it may be, it's true. I won't caucus for him and I won't vote for him in the primaries. This country isn't ready for a black president.

Dennis Kucinich

Dennis would make a great president. He's honest, and tells it like it is. His problem is that he comes off like a nerd. 3% of the population is nerds. 3% can't win. Of all the candidates I'm going to talk about today, he's probably the best man for the job. America hates nerds far more than women and blacks. Nerd's are smart. 97% of America is stupid. Dennis will end up with about 3% of the vote in the primaries. Since he can't win, I won't caucus for him and I won't vote for him in the primaries. This country isn't ready for a nerd president.

Chris Dodd

Hell will freeze over before he gets the nomination.

Bill Richardson

Here's a guy that has a good message. Look at his resume. America has to hate somebody. We've turned on Mexicans now. Our government has turned a blind eye to illegal immigrants for years and now they use it for political purposes. 97% of Americans are stupid. Child psychology works. America wants to blame the Mexicans coming here. I can't blame them. They are trying to make a better life for their families. If the tables were turned you'd do the same thing. If our government wanted to stop Mexicans from coming into this country, they could. They don't want to. Bill might be electable as a vice-president but I won't caucus for him and I won't vote for him in the primaries.

Al Gore

Probably the best man for the job. After all, he won once. He can do it again. He cares about the environment, and he cares about people. I realize he's not in the race, but he could win.

JOHN EDWARDS

I would like to introduce you to the next president of The United States of America. John Edwards wasn't born with a silver spoon in his mouth. John Edwards is the son of a working man. He's pro-union. He cares about the working people of this country. To all of you anti-union pieces-of-shit. Fuck-off and die. If it wasn't for unions, you would be working in conditions like the Chinese. I will caucus for JOHN EDWARDS, and I will vote for JOHN EDWARDS in the primaries. Then I will vote for JOHN EDWARDS for president. JOHN EDWARDS will work for the working man.

Opinions are like ass-holes; I just showed you mine.
Ed