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A Little of This and a Little of That By Clyde Thursday, January 19, 2006 Okay someone forgot to forward me the memo when the Republican Party decided to turn into a bunch of pussies. For a group that in the past would bitch and moan about less government intrusion and strict interpretation of the constitution I find it odd that they would stand for the full frontal assault on our most basic freedoms by the Bush Administration. Since 9/11 these people have been crawling upon their bellies like cur dogs and slurping up the Ken-L-Ration fed them by the Bush Administration. Are they that really scared that they will become the victim of terrorism? You have a better chance of dying from blood poisoning from an infected hemorrhoid than you do from Abdul strapping C-4 to his ass and blowing up the local strip mall. For the first time in history I agree with Bill O'Reilly on a subject except for different reasons. Bill doesn't like gay cowboy movies and neither do I. My idea of a blockbuster is a movie having breasts that you can bounce a quarter on, someone gets beaten repeatedly about the head or face and the story line does not contain a love story no matter what the gender make up is. So it is safe to say that "Broke Back Mountain" is not going to be in my NetFlix queue anytime soon. Bill doesn't like it because the chuck wagon does not serve falafels on a regular basis and cold water baths take the fun out of Loofa-ing your bronco buddy. Speaking of the Falafel King, did you hear he has laid claim to the Martin Luther King Jr. legacy? On a recent edition of his radio show he said something to the effect that because he came from modest beginnings he was a shining example of the MLK dream for America. I can see where being a successful white man from suburbia with a college degree and a loud mouth is exactly what Dr. King had in mind in regards to race relations. Fucking idiot! Sean Hannity has his BVD's in a wad over Hillary Clinton's statement that congress is being run like a plantation. Despite the fact that such paragons of virtue like Newt Gingrich, Trent Lott and Robert Novak have used the same metaphor is of no consequence to the Hitler Youth Poster Boy. The hypocrisy of this piece of human waste is beyond imagination and I am willing to pay big money if Ann Coulter would just fill his mouth full of tube steak and shut him the fuck up. Is anyone else tired of seeing Little Snotty McFelon on their television or is it just me? This twerp's whole demeanor is as annoying as a stray hair tickling the taint and his voice makes me want to clean my ears with an ice pick. Do you want to know the main difference between Democrats and Republicans? Republicans attack a problem and Democrats fix them. For example how would this hypothetical situation be dealt with by the two political persuasions? You have a significant other who has not trimmed the pubic region in some time and it is beginning to bother you. If you are a Republican you would denounce this behavior as being anti-Christian and all out assault upon the family values that made this nation great. If you are a Democrat you look down and make sure that the next romantic interlude involves a mouthful of bubble gum. Problem Solved! Permalink :: 0 comments :: Post a Comment   Hang-em High By Clyde Thursday, January 5, 2006 Was I the only one who heard the rapid fire staccato of assholes slamming shut in Washington when word was leaked that Jack Abramoff had decided to cooperate with a Justice Department investigation into congressional influence peddling? Why the sphincter abuse currently being experienced in our nation’s capitol is enough to make a gay pride parade salivate with sexual desire. Since Abramoff’s guilty plea we are witnessing an emptying of pockets by many legislators in an effort to absolve himself or herself of any involvement with the former Washington lobbyist. But like Ann Coulter trying to cover up her vasectomy scar, nobody with half a brain will believe it. And those that do are in dire need of chemical castration so that they cannot subject this country to any further declination of the gene pool. You would think that the Party of accountability would demand atonement for the sins committed by their leaders. Yet the Twinkies over at Free Republic cannot reconcile themselves with the fact that they have been had. The fact of the matter is that their Party is run by a bunch of criminals and this is fast becoming a watershed moment for these Republican apologists on whether they should give their loyalty to the Party over the rule of law. After five years of finding ways to justify their Party's total retreat from its core principles you would think that even the most ardent supporters of the neo-conservative movement would begin to demand accountability. But that is not the case with a large part of the Republican Party. Instead these people have decided that it is far more important to back political figures with an "R" behind their name than what is good for the country. Why would people of this ilk be such willing accomplices to people who blatantly break the law? The only sane reason is that these people have been so mind fucked over the years by assholes like Limbaugh and Hannity that you could not have a more compliant sector of the electorate if you were to stick an Oreck to their ear, suck out their brain leaving just enough gray matter behind to keep the drool from running down their chin. The fact of the matter is that their Party is corrupt from top to bottom yet they are unwilling to realize that fact. While they chanted the "Clinton got a blowjob" mantra they did not want to recognize the fact that they were being dry fucked in the ass by criminals like Tom Delay and Jack Abramoff. These people's eyes glaze over and begin to babble about how it is Clinton's fault for 9/11 but speak with pride about how we have not been attacked since because of George W. Bush's leadership skills. How ironic is it that the Chief Chimp-in-Charge sat in a classroom reading "The Pet Goat" with a group of fourth graders who have a better grasp of the English language than he does yet gives these people a sense of security? For all of their foibles Clinton and the Democrats look like saints compared to the group of thieves running Washington. The Abramoff scandal could very well be the catalyst needed to clean up Washington and those involved must be punished to the fullest extent of the law. It does not matter what political affiliation the culprit has be it Democrat or Republican, liberal or conservative, they all have to answer for their actions. Hang-em, hang-em all and hang-em high!!!1! Permalink :: 0 comments :: Post a Comment