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"The NASCAR Liberal"
clyde@dubyaD40.com |
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This week in the news 8-16-07
by
Clyde
8:11 AM
This week's top story:
Alabama teenager what's her name is still somewhere, Anna Nicole Smith still reeks of formaldehyde and PresiDunce Bush tries to mend fences with France. Yes folks, our idiot savant in chief entertained French president Nicholas Sarkozy to a lovely meal of hot dogs, hamburgers and Boone's Farm this week in an effort rebuild the long alliance the two countries have shared the last two hundred plus years. Isn't that a lot like serving macaroni and cheese to Julia Child?
War Czar Lt. General Lute has recently suggested that we as a nation may need to consider a draft to refill the ranks of the military.
In related news, pilonidal cyst epidemic hits college Republicans.
KKKarl Rove will be resigning his post as Deputy Chief of Staff and Chief Political Advisor to the PresiDunce at the end of this month in order to spend more time with his family. His family files for divorce.
Mattel has issued two recalls of their products when it was discovered that lead based paint was used in the manufacture of several toy lines. Dixon Ticonderoga Office Products stock plunged when it was reported that parents across the country were finding number twos in their toddler's Pampers.
In entertainment news, it is being reported that Britney Spears has added canyon yodeling to her talents as she was seen making out with her assistant Shannon Funk in a topless romp at a hotel swimming pool. A hotel source said: "Even though the pool was closed, some people still saw them - and their jaws hit the floor. Britney seemed more into this girl than she has ever been into a guy." Let's go to the videotape... Please
Faux News has announced that it will be canceling its "1/2 News Hour." It is rumored that the show was cancelled because Ann-Dee Coulter's part as the Vice President scared Dick Cheney.
Finally, it is reported that the report that will be given to congress by General Petraeus will be written by the White House. No shit? Who'd a thunk it?
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1 comments
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Did I just read this right? Pencil dick George is a 'savant'? Pray tell at what? "A man or profound or extensive learning" is how my Websters defines it and I'm keenly awaiting the news of what this ability I seem to have missed is. Come on Clyde, the whole frigin world wants the answer to this one!
posted by
at 11:24 PM |
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