My weekly load of crap
by
Clyde
8:27 AM
This week it was announced that nine of the thirteen Republican candidates for president have accepted former First Lady Nancy Reagan's invitation for a debate that is to be televised on MSNBC. Just think, if they can get all thirteen to attend, then they will have successfully gathered more dicks vying for a single spot since Anna Nicole Smith's last menstrual cycle.
Senator John McCain was once again successful in his efforts to undermine his own candidacy. In an act that is akin to wiping one's ass with a cheese grater, McCain took a trip to a Baghdad market to show how safe it is. Clad in Kevlar, with Apache Gunships overhead and surrounded by American troops the once lauded front-runner for the Republican nomination tried to make it seem as all was well and that the surge was working. Fucking moron!
An Air Force Veteran is seeking $200,000 and unspecified damages because doctor's at the West Los Angeles VA Medical Center removed the wrong testicle. Because the left testicle had atrophied and could possibly contain cancer cells Benjamin Houghton, 47, was set to have it removed. Imagine Houghton's surprise when he was informed that they had mistakenly removed the right testicle and that the infected one was still in place. Can anyone say medical malpractice? If I were a Republican and therefore against any case brought by a trial lawyer, I would look to the bright side and conclude that the removal will result in getting rid of that wicked slice in his golf swing. Thank God, I am not a Republican.
Is it just me or does it seem a little strange that the 15 British Marines captured by Iran were a little to quick to confess? With no signs of abusive treatment, these supposed hard core, battle ready troops began to admit that they were in Iranian waters from the very start. If I were a betting man I would put money down that they were ordered into an area in order to provoke the Iranians into a fight. But president Adickinmyhand didn't take the bait so therefore military action by the Allies could not be waged. I guess Tony Blair just can't get off of Georgie's lap.
Speaking of blowjobs, could George W. Bush be a homosexual? Well looking to the past we see a dominatrix who says she witnessed Shrub taking the chrome off another guy's trailer hitch, (Hat tip to Mick) a male prostitute visiting the White House hundreds of times and the fact that Bush took a fancy to the Canadian Prime Minister's male press secretary, one has to wonder. Couple that with his penchant for using the word "fabulous" and the following exchange taken from the official White House transcript:
Bill.
Q Mr. President, a lot of the disagreement over --
THE PRESIDENT: Wrong Bill.
Q Which one, him?
THE PRESIDENT: No, you. The cute-looking one.
I've concluded that Bush likes to occasionally tickle a tallywhacker.
And finally:
Alabama teenager Natalee Holloway is still missing, the NASA astronaut still has a job, the Duke Lacrosse Team is still in school and Anna Nicole Smith is still dead!
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