Thanks George
by
Clyde
9:07 AM
With the fragmentation of the Republican Party, I thought it would be appropriate to thank the one who has done more for their demise than anyone else, George W. Bush.
I want to thank the MENSA reject for my tax cut. You see, I just finished doing my taxes and I have discovered that the monetary windfall I'm receiving is going to allow me to splurge on a bag of Cheetos for Super Bowl Sunday. It is comforting to know that while I am savoring the nectar known as the "Beer of the week" during the half-time extravaganza, I will get to see that familiar orange glow on three parts of my body illuminated by the ole Trinitron.
I also want to thank the Simian for the NSA wiretaps. There is nothing Americans detest more than to have their government looking over their shoulder like Dr. Procto with his barbed wire scope.
Thank you for the Dubai ports deal. Why, that little turd in the punch bowl did more damage to the Republican claim of being strong on national defense than a "Shooter" Cheney deferment. Yep, nothing spells "security" like a deal with the financiers of the worst attack upon American soil in history.
Thanks for the doctrine of pre-emptive war. You pretty much put the Republican Party's dick in the ole meat grinder with that nugget of insanity didn't you? After four years of war and thousands of dead and wounded Americans, your "taking the fight to the enemy" has got members of your Party running from you like a cub scout troop from a Limbaugh camping trip.
I cannot express my gratitude to you for trading nuclear secrets to India for mangos. Why, cooks across the country will be able to brighten up their fruit salad while Musharraf and Kalam play a game of nuclear football. Nothing fights the "war on terror" like handing off weapon technology to the enemy of the nuclear power that is protecting Osama bin Laden. What's next, you going to start selling military surplus to Iran? Oh that's right, you already are.
Kudos for Terri Schiavo! The way you stopped playing with your Mr. Potato Head long enough to pander to the religious right was truly magnificent. The way you and your Republican retards inserted yourselves into a family decision was a lot like an Ann Coulter strip tease, nothing more than a whole lot of junk.
You did a heckuva job with FEMA didn't you? It took a lot of balls to put an Arabian horse show promoter in charge but you got it done. That little tidbit could cost your Party the southern strategy they have come to know and love.
I could go on but the fact of the matter is this George, you just keep on doing what your doing and it will not be long before you have successfully drowned the Republican Party in the proverbial bath tub.
(Please people, part number three is my stomach from wiping my fingers on my T-shirt. Get your minds out of the gutter. Sheesh!)
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