Buh Buh, But What About Clinton?
By Clyde
Thursday, April 21, 2005
Trying to talk to a Republican about the corruption of their Party's leadership is a lot like trying to push a rope, no matter how hard you try it always veers off to the side. Bringing up the faults of their honored conservative chieftains triggers an automatic response every time. First their eyes will roll back into their skull. Spittle will begin forming at the corners of their mouth. Their hands begin to shake like they have a bad case of Parkinson's disease and their mouth begins to open and shut like a trout out of water. This is also the time when you will see them spasmodically go into to the cranial to rectal insertion mode and you begin hearing the anally echoed pre-programmed Clinton bashing.
After eight years of donning a raincoat and miners helmet in order to facilitate the in-depth rectal exam of William Jefferson Clinton, you would think that they would at least hold their top officials to a code of conduct that they so fervently demanded during Clinton's term in office. Instead they refuse to hold these contemptuous inept troglodytes accountable for actions that can only be described as criminal.
In the past, we on the political left have always tried to use facts when we have a political discussion with a member of the lemming right-wing. This is a tactic that has proven itself to be totally useless when put up against the herd-like mentality that is so prevalent with our Republican friends. So in an effort to break down the wall of spoon fed right-wing talking points, when you have the next political discussion with a Republican about what is wrong with their leadership, bring up Clinton before they do.
The preemptive invocation of Bill Clinton can be used in a wide variety of subjects brought up by our friends on the right. Everything from the war in Iraq to Tom the "nailed" Delay's ethics violations has a Bill Clinton talking point you can use. For example: When they try to tell you that the invasion of Iraq was warranted because he was a threat to the United States, remind them about the complaints we heard about when Clinton ordered missile strikes during the Monica Lewinsky scandal. All we heard was "no war for Monica" but not one word about rape rooms or death chambers. It would seem that the only time that the only time that Saddam becomes a threat to our safety is when Texas oilmen with the knack for butchering the English language are in the White House. Or when discussing campaign contributions, talk about how they whined about Bill Clinton's Vice President Al Gore over a campaign event given in a Buddhist Temple but now it is okay for a House Majority leader to receive lavish golfing trips and vacation getaways to Scotland, Russia and Saipan paid for by lobbyist's for Indian gaming, Russian oil companies, sweatshop clothing manufacturers and the sex trade entrepreneurs.
When they bring up family values remind them about Elian Gonzales and how evil it was when he was returned to a birth parent in a country that has a guaranteed education for every child, universal health care for all and a lower infant mortality rate than this country. But how noble it is that because of tax cuts for the wealthiest among us, every child born in this country is already in debt to the tune of over $22,000.00 or that they support a Vice President who advocates legislation that would discriminate against his own child.
By playing the Clinton card before they can, you will reap benefits beyond your wildest dreams. It will force them onto an unfamiliar playing field with a different set of rules and thereby giving you the chance to break through their pre-programmed response. Have fun with it by making it into a game where you try to see how many times you can actually hear their panties wadding up into their colon when they try to come up with a talking point that was not dictated to them from the hillbilly heroin addict. Or you could try to score points for the amount of foam that forms at the corner of their mouth because of the hyperventilation that results when they are forced to find the few remaining brain cells that would allow them to attempt to make a coherent argument instead the inane comments given to them from the Hitler Youth poster boy. Maybe you could lay wagers with other liberals to see how fast their expression turns into one that resembles the face of an uncooperative bowel movement because they cannot use a hate filled euphemism taught to them by an anorexic bottle blonde who suffers from testosterone poisoning.
The biggest problem we liberals have is that we think about an issue and try to attack the problem intelligently. This cannot work when you are talking to a reactionary mind-set like the conservative philosophy. So instead we need to use every tool at our disposal and use it against them. And as long as we take the Clinton argument and use it as our own, we will succeed in forcing the average every day Republican to face the facts that they have ran from for the last five years.
Permalink
::
0 comments
::
|
|
| |
|
| |
|
| |
|
| |
<$BlogCommentBody$>
posted by
<$BlogCommentAuthor$>
at <$BlogCommentDateTime$> <$BlogCommentDeleteIcon$> |
| |
|
| |
|
|
